The "The" Phenomenon

I was waiting patiently in line to order my combo #1, value size, when I overheard what on the surface would appear to be a normal exchange, but when looked at deeper yields enough insight for...well, at least for a blog post. The woman next to me said plainly, "I'd like a salad with the ranch". "A salad with the ranch dressing?" the cashier repeated. "Yes," nodded the customer. As my title mentions, I call this the "The" phenomenon.

What exactly is it? It is the use of the article "the" on nouns that typically do not require the specificity that the article gives. While not grammatically incorrect, it is noticeable when used. In many cases this happens with people where English is not their first language, but it has also been known to happen with many a worried suburban parent when directing the challenge, with furrowed brow and intent stare, "have you been smoking the pot?"

What I find amusing about this is that the noun being given such importance usually does not deserve it, and when it does it is funny for precisely this reason. The woman in the Chik-fil-a was extremely excited about her ranch dressing. So much so that she used "the" to elevate it to a higher plane (at least I like to think it was intentional). This was no longer any other plastic container of mass produced ranch dressing, this was The Ranch Dressing. I half expected there to be an echo and a symphonic crescendo accompanying it.

I think we should make more of an effort to realize the "the" phenomenon in our day to day life. It makes life interesting and adds importance to otherwise trivial occurrences. So the next time a waiter asks what you would like to drink, answer, "I'd like the Coke, please". No one else may even notice, but I bet that Coke will be the best you've ever had. After all, it was The Coke. Oh, and after the waiter drops it off, be sure to tell him the thank you.